Reflecting on life with fostered children in our house - Aby's story #SandD2015

I was 18 when my parents started fostering and was living at home during my first year at university.   My mum had worked in family services for many years and saw the impact a poor start in life had on children - she really wanted to make a difference.

For a few years my parents offered respite care to a little boy with autism and global delay.  At home with his birth family he had no mental stimulus to speak of; no books, toys or trips out.  Our family cared for him every fortnight and provided the right environment for him to grow and develop, and we watched him become more confident with every visit.   He stopped coming to see us when he was seven, but we still see him around our area occasionally and he’ll shyly say hello, hopefully with happy memories of the time we spent together.  On one occasion a boy of six came to stay with us in the middle of the night, just one week before Christmas.  It was a mad dash from my parents to provide him with a ‘normal’ Christmas, and he was delighted that Santa made it to our house for Christmas Day.

Finding her feet

One particularly special girl called Mary came to stay with us ten years ago.  Mary had had a tough start in life and desperately needed a stable and safe environment around her to try and make up for the crucial time that she had lost.  When she first arrived there was no running around, playing, shouting or temper tantrums you would expect from a three year old. She soon found her feet however with us as her foster family, and ended up staying with us permanently through special guardianship orders.  Mary is now 13 and whilst she has special needs and faces challenges in her day to day life, she has gone from strength to strength.

Mary is just like any other young teenager: she has sleepovers with her friends, sulks when she’s not allowed her iPad, laughs and argues with her cousins in equal measures and idolises her older sisters.    She has been swimming in the Great Barrier Reef and on some of Florida’s biggest roller-coasters.   She recently came first in the ‘National Under- 14 Disability Novice trampolining’ competition with her school and she made the local paper with her team-mates.  For a child that could barely walk or talk when she first arrived with us, seeing how far she has come makes me immensely proud.   I will always be proud to call Mary my sister, as through fostering she became my family.  

This blog was written as part of our Sons and Daughters Month blogging competition. Find out more about Sons and Daughters Month.